Ultimately

Obedience is better than sacrifice...
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I guess... I wont go
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in that... God would be most glorified
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with regard to everything else
I guess...
I dont want to cry
I dont want to think about it
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but
...faith is the assurance of things hoped for, the conviction of things not seen
Heb 11:1
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therefore I shall believe that
ultimately God will make all things beautiful in His time
one way or another...
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I just need
to surrender to God
give in...
but not give up...
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and let Him do whatever He pleases
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and make my one desire Him
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after all
Seek first His kingdom and His righteousness
and all these things will be added unto you as well
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I’ve lost focus yet again
placed the cart in front of the horse so to speak(quote lua)
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placed people I cared for above God
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forgiveness
for making the same old mistake
given freely by the God who picks us up when we fall...