letting go

its more than just how i feel about friends
and people
-
letting go, my dreams, my hopes, my aspirations
into God’s hands
-
I don’t understand
so many times
-

---

disappointment
that’s a lot of what I know now
-
even whatever few successes
they may be regarded in failures too
-
stuff I felt so strongly about
they never happened
they never came to pass...
-
if faith is being sure of things hoped for
and certain of what i cannot see
-
I have no faith
hope has brought so many disappointments
-
I dunno how to show love
if by doing so
I end up creating more hate
-

---

simply put
I’m just totally burnt out
-
just waiting for Tekong resort
to put me somewhere
perhaps
where I can find God again

---

“you need to learn that world doesn’t revolve around you”
but its really more than that
perhaps
people think I’m just immature in the way I handle things
but seriously
I know why
but not how
-

---

sigh
if only perhaps...
I wish
everything stays the way it is
-
yet
its all part of growing up
-

---

I know
He has called me...
to somewhere
some place
-
May He show it to me...
-

---

sighs
I wish my mind would stop drifting away...
somehow...