Hope ignites new beginnings and a new life once again. But yet it also means that we have an increased propensity to be disappointed again when the reality of life fails to meet our expectations.
While the experience might have reignited a greater passion for God and to learn to trust Him more, it had a similar effect on an old issue I simply tossed aside to be drowned out by work and everything else.
I want a heart that is right before God, a heart of cheerful obedience towards God, that depends solely on Him to provide grace for me.
But I’m scared I’ll get hurt again by this old issue. I don’t want it to end up dragging me down again, but yet my thoughts keep wandering back to it. And the emotions that went into it became even stronger after weeks of repression and distraction. I thought it would have been easier to just confront it in its earlier stages and move on. But I never had a chance …
I spoke to Marc about it a few days back about how I felt, along with the other issue. His response was: “just got to see how it goes”. Maybe thats the best advice I can get for now. Strange thing is this has every possibility to go either way. But whatever happens I want an outcome that glorifies God more, and that brings people closer to Christ, and that builds people up to love Him more…
God, give me wisdom. I guess there’s no straight and easy solution to this one…
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